The Squirrel Diaries: And So It Begins

The epic battle has begun. I was waiting for this. The first flare of battle. If you’d like to see the evidence for yourself, the proof of their first strike can be found in the picture below. (Warning: the following picture shows a graphic image of damaged fruit. Please feel free to stop here if squirrel-mangled peaches makes you squeamish.)

I found this yesterday when grooming the fruit trees. I was enjoying my time out in nature when I spied this poor, severely mutilated peach. It never stood a chance to that pillaging squirrel!

Look at this peach tree so full of fruit!

Do you blame me for wanting to have at least one of these delicious peaches? The problem is, the squirrels eat every last peach on the tree, before they’re even ripe! I have a theory. I think they’re actually after the pit which may be why they go for the fruit while it’s still green. If they just knew that if they waited, I would throw them all the pits they want!

If you don’t know the story, I described more about the history of my battle with these squirrels in a recent post. The true dilemma rests in the fact that my family and I are vegans. As a result, we have to find humane ways of dealing with these frutarian varmints. For example, here are the remnants of last year’s battle.

Bird netting. My cousin (a Master Gardner) told me that we could wrap designated fruit in this bird netting and it might protect them. We estimate it slowed the squirrels down a few hours. Possibly a day. But they won that battle. They ate each and every piece of fruit in all three of our backyard fruit trees. And some of these trees produce a lot of fruit!

We’re willing to share, but those pesky squirrels are so selfish, they eat them all. OK. Deep, cleansing breathing. I. Will. Be. Calm.

But I have a new plan for this year. (I LOVE having a plan!) Take a look at my new weapon of choice.

Matt commented on my previous squirrel-hating post and gave a recipe for cayenne pepper repellent. My husband and I went to Home Depot yesterday and bought this handy dandy sprayer. It sounds like a lot of work to spray down these trees every couple of days, but I think it’s worth it to realize our dream of eating fruit from our own back yard!

We did have a little laugh to ourselves yesterday though. Wouldn’t it be ironic if we finally got some fruit but it was tainted by the taste of cayenne pepper? We’re hoping that this cayenne squirrel repellent doesn’t seep into the DNA of the fruit! (Please, no!)

I’ll be updating you on this battle as the summer days progress. Wish me luck!

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11 Responses to The Squirrel Diaries: And So It Begins

    • I love cayenne, jalapenos, red peppers. You name it! I’m just hoping those squirrels don’t!

  1. Very funny post. Written in true war doctrine style. Good luck with the battle of unripened fruit. Wouldn’t it be great if you could just fire your pits at them. That would be awesome.

    Cheers!

    • I would tie them up in a bow if they would let me eat the peach. It’s so difficult to reason with squirrels!

  2. Squirrels are the worst. They are evil little rats with bushy tails. They throw acorns at me all the time. But I do feel bad for them. Good luck getting rid of them!

    • Get outta here! They actually throw acorns at you? I swear I had a squirrel hiss at me once. I hope our squirrels never breed with your squirrels. Can you imagine? Hissing, acorn-throwing fruit-eating little varmints. I tell ya, it’s a good thing for these little fellas that I’m vegan.

      Thanks for your good wishes. I’ll keep you posted on what happens this summer.

    • Oh, that’s so sad. Walnuts are so tasty. See? That’s another thing I would want to know I grew in my own yard. Walnuts! Can you imagine serving banana nut bread with walnuts you gathered from your yard. Lisa, go buy cayenne pepper. We’ll keep our fingers crossed that it works!

  3. My daughter tried netting around her tomatoes last summer. You’re right – the netting just slows them down a bit. Squirrels will not be thwarted. I have mixed feelings about squirrels and rabbits. I think they are darling and cute…and I hate them when the squirrels rob my birdfeeders and the rabbits destroy my garden.

    Good luck! Keep us posted.

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